The Trial of Lancelot
by JustBeAQueen
Summary: This story is in response to a challenge by Beater101. Write a story using the song The Trial of Lancelot by Heather Dale, involving any number of worlds, one choice choice being the Queer as Folk world. So here it is, my only fantasy. Rated MA for language and content cause you can take Brian off Liberty, but you can't take Liberty from Brian.
1. Chapter 1

I wrote this story in answer to a challenge by Beater101 who wanted a story based on the song The Trial of Lancelot, by Heather Dale. The song may not be what I would typically listen to, nor is it a standard rock song; it's kind of new agey and very soft. However, since it is quite literally based on the Trial of Lancelot, and I absolutely loved the tale of King Arthur, I couldn't help but read the lyrics and therefore be inspired to write a fan fiction based on the song. If you're curious about the song itself, it's on YouTube (song and lyrics).

This was meant to be a quick story, with a brief intro, the song and a one paragraph conclusion. I underestimated by own mind and love of King Arthur, and went overboard. This is my first fantasy fanfic, so please go easy on the reviews if you don't like it.

**Disclaimer**: Don't own Brian, Justin, QAF, or King Arthur or Camelot, or any other character, time or place fantasized below. They're all owned by other people, aye me to not be born unto a time of epic tragedies and romances… but then again, I probably would have been a witch and burned at the stake, so it's not so bad.

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><p>King Arthur was the most powerful king Britain had ever seen, and he was the most well known King Britain had ever had. But he was also a just and humble king, for, you see, he never asked to be king. He became King through a very unusual series of fantastical events. The people respected him, his knights protected and fought with him, and his reign was magnificent.<p>

There was however something about King Arthur that few people knew, and that history changed in order to fit with most people's acceptance of today's life. It was not Guinevere that Arthur loved, at least not the way most thought. Oh, he loved her, as you would your best friend and confidant. She was very close to Arthur indeed, but as an advisor more than a lover. No, people would never have accepted who Arthur truly loved, loved with all his heart, mind, soul and body… it was Lord Justin. You've heard the phrase if walls could talk… well, if Camelot could tell you what it's seen and heard… nay, no one would believe it. For how could the greatest King of all time be gay?

Very easily Arthur would tell you. You see at the time of kings and knights, there was also witchcraft and magic, white and black magic, spells, potions and sorcery. It was a time many now would consider primitive, but it was also a time of open-minded free thinkers who accepted and loved and protected. True, there were those who did not accept, but they simply refused to believe, for they did not have direct contact with the King, who so often strolled through the streets of his kingdom with Guinevere. Partially because it garnered respect for the King and Queen to be seen together, in all their sovereign glory, but partially because he wanted to protect Justin.

For you see while Guinevere knew all the Kings secrets, being his most trusted advisor, she could also take care of herself, so he never feared any harm coming to her. Justin, on the hand, while certainly strong of will and heart, his body, while so perfect in all forms of pleasure, was not so perfect against those enemies who would want to capture someone close to such a powerful King. And King Arthur's greatest fear was that Justin would be taken away from him. So Justin primarily stayed in the palace doing his King's bidding, he loved to draw and paint, so many of Camelot's paintings and tapestry was by Lord Justin.

Now Justin was very special you see. Everyone in the palace loved Justin as well. They knew his place in the King's heart and in the King's bed. Only few knew something else, something very few knew and they kept to themselves, for they saw what really went on. They also knew how Justin felt and how much it meant to him to have a few moments of peace and true happiness to be himself, and not the King's secret lover.

Justin helped regularly in the kitchen, for he did not think it's servant work at all, he loved being in the hustle and bustle of the palace's busy kitchen with the warm welcoming bakers and cooks, especially the palaces head baker, Lady Debbie… the best baker in all of Britain, some would say, and she would heartily agree with you. Her son worked in the kitchen, too… Michael and Justin would spend hours together talking about all the goings on in the palace. Justin loved to hear all the happenings outside in the real world, within and outside of the kingdom's boundaries. Michael dealt with all the local farmers and butchers to make sure that Camelot always got the best. So he always had the most amazing stories. Justin's favorite stories to hear were about the kingdom's best party planner, Lord Emmett, for he not only had the best outfits Justin had ever heard of, but no matter how queen-like Emmett was his parties were always the talk of the kingdom… nay, the country!

Now, my dear friends, comes the interesting twist to our tale. Justin did indeed enjoy his time in the palace, in the kitchens, in all the rooms, while he was painting or drawing or weaving or cooking. He loved spending time with Arthur, too. He was an amazingly sweet, soft, romantic lover, and the times that he was able to step aside from his kingly duties the two men spent many hours enjoying each other's company and bodies. Lord Justin loved Arthur very much, he would have done almost anything for him…yes, you heard correctly… almost anything. There was one pleasure, one secret, one joy, one love that Justin would never give up, even under direct order from his King and partner, and that was give up Sir Brian.

Thought I was going to say Lancelot, did you? Well, I would, but that was not the name he was known to Justin. You see Sir Lancelot did not want fame or praise, he simply wanted to serve his King and kingdom and fellow knights. He knew he was the best Knight there was and he had long been an advisor and trusted companion of King Arthur. He would do anything for his King and kingdom. He was dedicated to his station and his mission. Never would he be conflicted in his most esteemed role. But little did he know that events were put into motion that once started he could not stop, nor would he want to once started.

Lancelot had heard of, met and spoken to Queen Guinevere and he loved her greatly, as did all people who met her, she was a truly marvelous, honest, noble woman. Lancelot enjoyed his time with her and Arthur. Again, tales now have been twisted for the commoner to believe that it was Guinevere that Lancelot had an affair with, oh no my friends… it was Lord Justin. How, you ask? How did this transpire, that this key piece of the puzzle be excluded? Twas easy my friends, for only a very select few knew about Justin and Arthur's relationship. As I have mentioned it wasn't on purpose that Arthur hid Justin away, he felt he was protecting the small, weak bodied, strong hearted and minded man.

However, as fate would have it, King Arthur's knights did meet Sir Justin, not all at once, and the first time might have not been accident, but it certainly wasn't meant to ever hurt anyone involved. You know already that Justin loved Arthur… but what if you loved one man, and then met your soul mate? What would you do? How would you handle breaking one man's exceptional heart or deny your own destiny?

Rarely did the Knights make an appearance in the kitchens, for everything needed was brought to the main part of the palace regularly. It was after nightfall, long before the sun rose and Lancelot had not been sleeping well at all. He rarely wondered the castle alone late at night for it was very dark in places and difficult to see where one was going, even with a candle stick, it was uneasy. This same night Justin also did not want to sleep, although he simply wanted some time in the kitchen alone. Arthur was traveling with Guinevere, Justin lamented, and he would never be able to travel with him. Not that people of an alternative lifestyle weren't accepted, but with Arthur being King and married to, of course, the Queen, they were expected to travel together, visiting other family, not as sovereigns. So Justin didn't travel with them, not that Arthur would have taken him anyway, thinking he was weak and small. He might have been small, but he was hardly weak. One would think that after some of the activities they shared in their private chambers would teach Arthur how strong Justin was, but, alas, no, it did not.

It was rare that Arthur traveled without Sir Lancelot, his most trusted Knight. But this time Lancelot had just finished a mission for the King and Arthur felt he needed time off, so he took a couple of other trusted Knights with him instead. He rarely was away from his king, hence his uneasiness in the middle of the night. Justin, while used to being alone in bed at night, without his King and Queen and less Knights than normal, the palace was unusually quiet, hence Justin's uneasiness. As fate would have it, two uneasy souls were about to meet which would change their hearts and minds forever.

Justin was working in the kitchen, trying to transfer his ideas for a sculpture into a baked masterpiece. Of course it couldn't be large, due to the oven size, but it could be beautiful, and he knew what grains and seeds and berries and herbs to use to make the right colors for each part of bread.

Lancelot was wondering, learning the palace, he had never been to the kitchens, and having not eaten well at supper, having eaten alone, in his room, he was slightly hungry and hoped there would be some bread or something in the kitchens. He didn't want to wake up any servants. As Lancelot walked into the kitchen his feet froze, his heart stopped and his breathing increased. For before him was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. Even covered with a dusting of flour and hands dyed from the various ingredients he was using… who knew that servants worked this late, or that said servants would be so breathtaking.

Justin heard light footsteps before they entered the kitchen, but was not going to stop mixing, that is until he heard a deep, fast intake of breath as one would do if startled. He looked up…into the face of a god. Wondrous hazel eyes, perfectly bronzed skin, the most amazingly sculpted, yet wavy and soft chestnut hair he'd ever seen. Such a perfect specimen of a man. Never had Justin so wanted to paint a picture in all his life as right now… better yet, trace those perfect muscles with his hands… or tongue. Now his breath caught. He'd never seen this man before, didn't know where he came from or what he was doing in the castle, but with Arthur away, and surely since this man was simply dressed in plain clothes (as was Justin) then it was most likely that Arthur knew he was here while he was away. Of course there were many people that dealt with the King and his Knights that Justin had never met.

Lancelot didn't know what to do. He should undoubtedly say something to this beautiful man with eyes a deeper clearer blue than the sky on the most perfect day. Hair that shone brighter than the sun on the clearest of days and skin such a splendid alabaster tone, he must not leave the palace. How could one so small and light and beautiful never leave the palace. Something told him this man was not weak, though, sweating and working hard in a kitchen is not simple work for the meek or timid. He had never seen this man in the palace either, and he knew many of the servants and workers. He wondered if he was new to Camelot, or if he just didn't prefer company. Oddly enough, he could almost sympathize if that was the case.

"Good evening, kind sir."

What a melodious voice, a choir of angels in heaven could not sound better.

"Good evening, to you, as well…I did not realize the kitchen ran this late."

Oh, of all the stupid things to say, how obvious can one be, try and be more clever next time.

"Typically they do not, but I have wanted to try something for quite some time and with the King and his Knights out of the castle, the whole palace slows down and Lady Debbie allows me to use the kitchen at times to experiment combining my art and my cooking ability."

"Well I did not mean to interrupt; I could not sleep and was thinking of finding myself something to eat quickly before trying to settle back down in…bed."

Just the thought of mentioning his bed to this man seems almost sinful; certainly Lancelot was not so lucky as to hold the interest of such an angelic man.

"You're not interrupting, per se, I have yet to start on the next part, but if you are hungry, might I offer that I fix you something. I am certain I can find something that is to your…liking."

Goodness, how to respond to that… something to his liking, Lancelot felt certain that had his answer been what he first thought "you" was not only too straight forward, but even were he to entertain such thoughts, Lancelot was an honest man who would seek to court this man fairly, if at all possible.

"I wouldn't want to impose, but since I have never been in the kitchens I wouldn't know where anything is. You could show me and I could get something myself. A little bread or meat would suffice, perhaps some drink as well. If it's not too much trouble."

Not too much trouble at all, Justin thought, for this exquisite man before him. He would interrupt anything, anything at all to be able to serve this man. Justin wiped his hands off and retrieved a loaf of bread, one that he had made earlier so it was not only fresh, but still slightly warm. It would be a pleasure to see what this man thinks of his baking. Justin also retrieved an apple that had arrived earlier in the morning from a local farmer, through Michael, along with some wonderfully aged mead that he knew was served to the Knights and Arthur regularly. He knew his way around the kitchen very well, and what it did to his head, heart, breathing, and another certain part of his anatomy that he was thankful was hidden behind a very thick apron, to have this man sit with him and watch him prepare his food. Maybe it sounded too romantic or too fairy tale like, but to serve this man with his hands, food that he had prepared, words could not do justice to what he was feeling.

"You are welcome to stay in the kitchen, if you'd like, you know, with the fire this is a very warm room, especially on a night like tonight when the castle can get very cool, very quickly. However, if you would prefer to retire to your room, I'm certain I could find a tray for you."

Justin was almost about to suggest to take the food to his room for him, but that would be far too much of a temptation, not to mention he did really want to keep working on his bread, he was almost done.

"If you wouldn't mind, I would prefer to stay here, it is rather warm. You are right about the castle being dark and cool. I've never really watched anyone bake anything, it would honor me if I could watch what you are doing."

"Ummm…of course, it would please me to have you watch me…that is, to have company and to watch me bake."

If Justin only knew the pleasure Lancelot was receiving from watching him, baking or not.

"If it's not too forward, could I ask your name and why you're in the castle? I know most of Arthur's Knights and many who come to and from the castle, but I don't believe I've ever seen you before and I know I would remember you… I mean, I remember people I meet very well."

At this point Lancelot was nervous, it wasn't often he didn't appear as a Knight, and he had forgotten he was only in his night clothes. If he introduced himself as a Knight to a baker who he'd never seen before, he wasn't sure what would happen. He did not like deceiving people, but he certainly did not want to leave this man's company. And he was very concerned that if this man knew he was a knight, the same thing would happen that always happens, they would bow and scrape and serve… and he did not like that at all. It was nice to enjoy someone's company free of his station and purpose, especially the company of someone so beautiful that could so capture his mind, body and heart. So Lancelot did the only thing he could think, he would tell this man the name that only his family had known him by… Brian. When he was but a boy, that's what he was to his family. Lancelot was a family name, and a proper name for a knight, who would believe that King Arthur and his Knights of the Round Table had a Sir Brian?

"My name is Brian and Arthur and I grew up together, I stay here frequently, though, so you must be new to the palace."

"Oh, ummm, my name is Justin and I am…a friend of the king as well, and I do many things around the palace. I am an artist and baker, occasionally a cook or cleaner. But I have been here since shortly after Arthur became King. It's odd that we haven't crossed paths before."

"Justin, it's an honor to meet such a fine baker and artist. I am surprised that you have been here that long, but no matter, I am curious, you said artist, does that only apply to what you are doing now? As it certainly looks as though you are an artist in the kitchen, although I would be interested in knowing what something you baked would taste like."

The kitchen was certainly brighter than other parts of the castle at the moment, but it was still moderately dim, with only the fire from the oven and a few candles just over head for Justin to see his bread. But even with limited light, Brian could see the redness of Justin's cheeks from the blush that statement caused.

"Well, then you might be interested in knowing you do know what my bread tastes like since the bread you are eating now I made just a little while before you came in."

"You did…then I must say it's delicious. I wasn't going to say anything as I didn't know if you knew the baker or not, but the flavors are wonderful."

"Thank you… Ummm… you asked about my art. I paint, draw, sew, and bake, but what I'm working on right now is something I've wanted to try for a while. I know all the various ways to get the tints of paint I need, and I wanted to see if I could get similar tints in bread. The idea came to me a while ago while I was watching the sun set, such wondrous yellows, oranges, reds and golds. Lady Debbie had made a loaf of bread a day later that was a similar yellow, and it got me thinking that maybe I could work out some tints to duplicate the sun in dough. This is the last part. Then I'll pull out all the different colored dough's and hopefully braid them in a way to best represent the sun."

Brian's speechless, but not for lack of wanting to say something, but because of wanting to remember Justin's voice without his own voice clouding the air. Such a delight to listen to, to watch, to be near. He doesn't know if anyone else in the castle shares his proclivities, but this young man… if they were to share…what good fortune that would be. So Brian sits and watches to his heart's content while eating his bread, his meal Justin prepared for him. He weaves his varied colored dough's together (never had he thought that bread could be so many colors) as a seamstress would weave her needle and thread. Although he should guess if he sows, that would be appropriate. Now Brian has to ask.

"So what do you paint, draw or sew? I've seen your baking and it's remarkable. I would love to see some of your other work. Considering I've been in this palace a number of times, I have probably seen your work, if there is any out to see."

"Oh, that would be… of course, I've painted many portraits around the castle, along with a few tapestries and several small portraits in the smaller chambers. I think the couple I am most proud of are in my chambers, of course, there is one painting in Arthur's chambers that I did specially for him. Then the one tapestry that, well, it wasn't my first, but it was my best. It's of my village, right after the start of Spring when there's still a little snow on the ground and the roofs and trees, but the sun shown bright and the grass was green as can be and the hillside in the distance was majestic and the sky, the sky was a most perfect blue… I have a painting in my room of the same scene, but I wanted to do a tapestry as well, so I did. And when the sun hits it at the right angle it's magnificent."

"That sounds like a most impressive tapestry…but I'm not sure if it's as good as the tapestry in my room, although it sounds very similar, did you do more than one?"

"I only did the one tapestry of that scene. What room are you staying in?"

"Near Arthur's chambers, in fact two doors down from his, to the right."

"Oh… really? That close to the king, I would have thought that…never mind, ummm…my tapestry, it is indeed two rooms over from Arthur's. It must be one in the same."

"Well I have stayed in that room anytime I'm here and I love the tapestry, although I don't think I've ever given it too long a look, I know how beautiful it is. If you made it, then perhaps at first light I will have to look at it more closely, you say at sun rise is the best time to view it?"

"Ummm, yes, sun rise… in fact that's why I chose that room to hang it. The window in there is right across from it. And I believe it's near sun rise now. My bread is almost done and I was down here for a while before you ventured in, if I were to guess sun rise would be shortly."

"One would almost think you designed your bread to be ready at sun rise so you could compare the two."

Again, Brian was practically speechless at the blush that ran across Justin's alabaster cheeks.

"Actually, I did, at least I hoped it did. Maybe not quite to compare the two, but since you can just see the sunrise in here through that window over there, it would be perfect."

"And that window happens to be facing the same direction as my window. Would it be a safe guess to say that you could see the sunrise even better from the upper window in my room?"

Ah, that beautiful blush again…Brian could all too easily learn to live for that blush.

"Ummm…yes, I could, that is, I mean you could, you know, see the sunrise from your room better than…down here."

"Well, I can see the sky lightening slowly from here, perhaps you would accompany to my room when your bread is done, and you could introduce me to your tapestry and maybe tell me about your village, so that I would be seeing what is meant to be seen, of course."

Oh dear… to be in Brian's room, Justin doesn't know if that's a good idea. Nothing needs to happen, right? Just show him the tapestry and then come back down, right? Right. He can do this. Justin keeps saying he's stronger than people think. And to be able to be in the company of just someone like a friend. No expectations, no assumptions, to be able to talk to someone who actually doesn't expect anything other than friendship. What a rare gift that Justin would be a fool for not taking advantage of…the situation, of course, not the man.

"Of course. I'd be glad to tell you all about my village, as time permits. Ummm… shall I bring my bread up as well, we can compare it together. I could bring some preserves and we could enjoy it sitting at, I believe there is still a table and chairs in there, under the window, is there not?"

If Brian were less a virtuous man he would certainly wish that the only surface to sit on would be the bed, but that would be not only too presumptuous, but also too forward for any civilized company.

"Yes, there are indeed chairs and a table. And I would be honored to try some of your bread and preserves. Would it be alright if we took some tea instead of mead, though, I believe that would fit a sunrise rather than ale."

"It would indeed, although, depending on the ale, that might work as well."

If Justin's blush was tantalizing, then Justin's laugh could be downright addictive. Never in Brian's life had he heard such a dazzling sound. Justin pulls his bread out of the oven a little before it should be out. The sun hasn't quite risen yet, but by the time they get back to *gulp* Brian's room (private chambers…oh my, Justin's not quite sure about this decision, yet, but to think about refusing this beautiful, kind man causes a pain so deep he's not sure how to process that hurt) the sun will be risen enough and the bread will have enough time to continue to cook and cool on its own. He gets a tray and prepares two mugs for tea, a small container of cream from the small ice box (a wonderful invention that Richard the Lion Heart had brought back long ago from China) along with some sugar cubes and one of the jars of preserves he helped make.

Brian offers to carry something, but Justin refuses, insisting that he can carry the heavy loaded tray, and based on the look of stubbornness and determination on Justin's face Brian can do nothing but allow Justin to carry it. The look of happiness of Justin's face at being allowed to carry this on his own without having to press the issue is worth letting Justin have his way. His smile lights up his face like, well, they're going to watch the sunrise together, and after watching Justin work and sweat in the kitchen and the passion so clear on his face by the light of the fire while talking about his art, he would bet that Justin's smile in sun light could rival the very sunshine itself.


	2. Chapter 2

Brian leads the way to his room so that he can at least open the door for Justin. He still feels guilty at not being able to help carry this heavy burden, he knows that he is taller and more muscular than this slight baker and artist. As Brian holds the door open and sees the first gentle light right before the sun comes over the horizon he turns to see Justin carrying the tray in. And he's struck with the ease with which Justin carries said tray. He's not struggling, not panting, perfectly capable of holding it. It's almost as if he's carrying feathers instead of a wood tray with food and mugs and tea pot. Then again with all the kneading of dough and mixing of food, Brian suddenly wonders what kind of muscles Justin does have, and his reaction strikes a lot lower than he might think, very glad that he is now behind Justin… oh, what a glorious view, and one that didn't help at all. For Brian is now beholding the most delicious, scrumptious, perfectly rounded bottom he has ever laid eyes upon.

How did he not notice those two perfect soft, plump spheres in the kitchen… the counter must have been too high. Although Brian realizes he was also watching Justin's eyes and mouth and face. His lips and tongue move in such rhythm that at times had Brian's mind wandering to other activities… no… calm down, enjoy the company and conversation. For Brian had never been one to indulge needlessly, just to fulfill a base desire. It was part of his service to the King that he behave as a Knight to the King of England. However, there was no rule preventing friendship, or dare he hope, eventual partnership. And Brian has a feeling, should any relationship beyond friendship be tried, that it would be so much more than a onetime tryst. No it would be so much more and last as long as he could stay.

And as Justin was laying everything from the tray onto the table under the window, the sun's first light was coming over the horizon and bestowing Brian with a sight that for all his long years, and all the years in front of him, he will ever recall the angels did bestow upon him a gift. A gift, a sight, a vision, a dream, so magnificent, glorious, and angelic that Brian felt that he should get down on bended knee and praise their creator. He was right, Justin in first morning's light was truly more marvelous than the pure sunshine!

"Sunshine" Brian whispered softly, he couldn't help but utter that word. That word that seemed made for Justin, and only Justin, and Brian was of good fortune enough to bear witness to such a miracle.

Upon hearing a soft whisper from Brian, Justin had to turn around and look at Brian. He heard Brian say sunshine, but couldn't look at the sunshine. He had to look at Brian to see what Brian was looking at. For certain that sounded a lot more reverent than if Brian was only looking at the sun rise. What he saw was shocking to say the least, for Brian was not looking at the sunrise or even at the tapestry. He was looking directly at Justin. Brian was starring at Justin with such intensity and passion. There was fire in his eyes and something, something so profound he could do nothing but stand and watch, starring into those hazel eyes as they came closer and closer, for Brian could not fight the urge to walk closer to Justin, to be closer to Justin. So close were they that they were practically breathing the same air.

"Sunshine…Justin." Brian couldn't help but say it again, nor could he stop his journey over to the beautiful man in his chambers, nor could he stop his hand from reaching up to smooth the hair back from his forehead and behind his ear. Brian was stunned, hair softer than he could imagine, skin like fine china, porcelain smooth, yet warm, soft and pliable. Neither man could fully breathe as each was struck breathless with feelings so new and thoughts so welcome, yet hard to fathom. Neither man had the strength to fight what they were feeling. Food forgotten, art forgotten, conversation forgotten… wanting to taste, but not the bread so painstakingly prepared, but each other. Two pairs of perfect lips, two pairs of soft, yet strong hands, two pairs of eyes silently asking and searching for answers, two pairs of perfect ears hearing the struggling breaths from both. Caught in this wave of passion and emotion, and though neither mentioned it, and both not quite understanding it, love, a love so deep, so true, so strong that nothing and no one could ever keep them apart.

Brian took Justin into his arms, wrapping them around his back just to hold him and as he felt Justin's arms come up around his shoulders he couldn't help but sigh a breath of utter peace and joy. Never had either man felt such oneness with another, neither questioning what they were doing any longer. The sense of self, of belonging, of acceptance and appreciation they both felt in each other's arms were so perfect that the only thought was needing to be closer to the other. And as the two men shared their first kiss all thoughts, entirely, left. Both moaning at the contact, both stunned by the delicious flavor of the other, both enjoying the delights of the other's lips and tongue. A sensual battle of their mouths filled with so much pleasure and passion that they couldn't help but to want more. To get to that point of no return where two became one, where they were joined as closely as humanly possible for there was no other choice for these two lovers.

Brian's hands moved of their own accord and untied Justin's apron, having it fall to the floor. He then brought his hands to the front to untie his pants at the same time Justin's hands seemed to be on the same journey on Brian. They pulled away from each other to pull their own shirts off and let their pants fall to the floor. Then they had no choice but to stand and stare, more like admire, no, exactly admire. Both reveling in the physical perfection that was their partner, what a glorious word, a word they both thought, a word that they would gladly call the other. One bronze lover, one alabaster lover, both perfectly muscled for their body size, both with a surprisingly large man hood that stood proud from both bodies, bathed in a perfect bed of soft curls that matched the hair on their heads.

Brian held out his hand to Justin who gladly accepted the invitation as Brian walked backwards to the bed, never wanting to take his eyes off his perfect lover. He scooted up the bed till he was lying down, but leaning up on his elbows while Justin crawled up his body. Which surprised Brian, he would expect his new lover to be timid and join him in the bed beside him, but he did not. Justin slowly and sensually slid up Brian's body till their erections brushed one another, both letting out surprising groans of pleasure. Surprising because neither man had ever felt such intense feelings for anyone who had shared their bed. While neither man has had a large number of partners, they do know more than enough in bed to please a partner. And when one has such a glorious and perfect lover to share one's bed, Justin couldn't help but use everything he could think of to please them both.

Justin laid himself taught on top of Brian's beautiful body; thighs, arms, chests, groins, and lips touching intimately, passionately, never wanting these feelings to end.

"Justin…you … you take my breath away… I've never known a lover to be so passionate, so all consuming...so stunning…"

"Brian…you are the most handsome man I have ever seen, and I don't know why I'm saying this but I feel as though we were meant to be… this feels so good, so right, so astounding."

"Sunshine… my sunshine…as soon as I saw you downstairs you took my breath away and I have been slowly drowning ever deeper in your beauty, your passion, your intelligence, I need you in a way I never thought I would need anyone."

"Yours? Truly I like the sound of that. It is stunning that I should find my hearts and souls desire from just baking bread one night, but it seems I have…but before we go any farther, I am afraid I have thought of something that I cannot keep to myself any longer. Not only out of my desire to be honest with you, lover, but out of respect for my king."

"What does your king have anything to do with what goes on in this room?"

"He has nothing to do with what goes on in here, with you, but he does have something to do me, although…I would like to explain, if I could, before we do anything we might regret, or before you get upset and throw me out."

"Sunshine, I could never throw you out. It doesn't matter what you could possibly say that would make me not want to by my side always."

"As happy as that makes me, let me explain before you decide. I don't know how much you know about Arthur, and I'm assuming since you didn't recognize me or my name you might not know Arthur as well as you think you do. You see…*deep breath* (Justin turns away from Brian because he cannot look his love in the eye before breaking his heart)… I am Arthur's lover."

He hears a sudden intake of breath from Brian. Justin knew it, but he must continue.

"I am sorry Brian, I have deceived you, I never meant to. I knew the moment I saw you, you would be ever special to me, but I could not continue knowing that if Arthur ever found out about my behavior he would hate me."

Justin is almost ready to get up and get dressed to leave when he feels Brian's hand on his naked back and Brian's other hand takes his chin and turns his head to face him.

"Justin…you're right, I clearly don't know Arthur as well as I thought, but it doesn't surprise me, not when someone so beautiful is right here, so tempting, how could he not take you. I can also completely understand how he could fall for you. But if you are being so open and honest, then I feel I should do the same, for you see, around here I am not known as Brian."

Justin waits in silence for Brian to finish. If they both have a secret that needs to be concealed then this truly is not a good idea. It will be the hardest thing Justin has ever had to do, but he knows he will have to give up Brian.

"I think once you know my name that all around here call me you will know exactly who I am…my name is Lancelot."

No, no, no, that can't be… that's oh, no. My Brian… my beautiful, perfect Brian is…is…Lancelot. Arthur's most favorite Knight, the one he trusts more than his own life. No…

"I am the one who is sorry Justin. I thought that you only worked in the kitchen and it was so nice to have someone to talk to without the expectation of being a Knight and loyal to only the King. I love Arthur and my oath is to serve and protect him with every ounce of strength and every breath I have. How could Arthur never mention having a lover? He has a Queen, Queen Guinevere, a most wonderful, honest, noble woman. You say you've been here almost as long as Arthur, how can no one know about you? How can he have a Queen? How does he have… never mind, ignore that question. Years, he's been King for years…Justin…oh dear lord, are you not supposed to leave…are you allowed to go outside. I've never seen you with the King. Goodness, I've been staying here for years and never knew and I am closer to the King than anyone else, well except Guinevere, and clearly, well, you."

Justin is again facing away from Brian trying desperately not to cry, but he feels his heart breaking. He knows how much Arthur loves him, and Justin could have sworn he loved Arthur, but he knows now he was never in love with Arthur, it's Brian… it's Brian he is in love with, his heart will always belong to.

"Brian…Lancelot…"

"Brian, please call me Brian…I never want to be Lancelot to you, with you. I was Brian when I was little, I only became Lancelot when I left home."

"Very well Brian… I don't know how to describe what I have with Arthur. Up until yesterday I would have said we love each other, but he had to have a Queen. Guinevere knows me and she knows our relationship, and you're right she's such an honest and noble woman, so understanding. She understands Arthur and his needs, although I don't think she knows how deeply he feels for me. And like I said, up until yesterday I thought I knew how I felt about him. But what you say is true, although I am not truly kept hidden. The people expect a King and Queen, if nothing else than to produce an heir. Arthur does love me, but he sees me as weak and small and in need of protection. He is always so scarred that if his enemies found out about me they would stop at nothing to find me and take me until Arthur did anything to save me.

"And while I understand his reasoning and I respect his fear and accept his protection, there are times it's like being a prisoner within these castle walls. I do not go outside, except in the stables directly behind the castle, and only when accompanied by Debbie or her son, Michael. I am very glad this palace has windows so I can look outside whenever I want. Arthur trusts everyone who works here and lives here, but he does like me staying more or less hidden. The fewer people know about me the safer I am. I don't know what it would do to him to lose me, but I may have no choice now."

"What do you mean, have no choice…no choice but to leave? Why would you leave? You wouldn't be safe, I can understand Arthur's thinking, he has some powerful enemies who would…*shudder*…I would never be able to forgive myself if anything happened to you. I would not survive without knowing you are free from harm. Although I also think that Arthur is wrong, you have a strength beyond many courageous men I know. You must truly love your King, but I don't understand why you say till only yesterday did you love each other."

Justin is trying his hardest not to cry, but a few tears escape anyway. Brian notices and moves to sit behind Justin. Justin gasps a little at the sudden contact, but also starts breathing hard at the knowledge that it's Brian sitting directly behind him, and, how he forgot he'll never know, but they are both still nude and a nude Brian behind him…this is not helping with the explanations. The way Brian is holding him, cradling him in his strong arms, his warm soft, but hard skin. No matter what they've said so far, it's nothing compared to how safe and loved he feels right now, safer than anything he's ever felt before.

"I know how Arthur feels about me, still does, possibly always will. I don't mind staying for my own safety, as I am familiar with his enemies, as well. I do wish I could venture outside more sometimes, but I make do with what I have. And yesterday…I hadn't met you. I…I love you, Brian…I'm in love with you, more fully, more deeply, more completely than I thought a person could love. I feel like I've known you my whole life, and it would kill me to be here and not be with you. I do love Arthur, and while we, let's say, enjoy each other's company, I have never felt as close to him or anyone, or as safe as I do right now, in your arms. I know I would not be as safe elsewhere, but I do not want to stay here if I cannot have you, can't see you, can't lay with you and touch you and talk with you."

"Justin, could you turn around please, I would like to look into your beautiful eyes now…"

Justin doesn't want to, but how could he deny this man anything? He turns and gasps again, the man is beyond words, indescribably perfect. Never has he seen anyone like his Brian…he can't even say his name without calling him his.

They both moan a little at the sudden contact. Justin straddling Brian's legs as Brian sits against the headboard. It's not the most comfortable position to talk in, but it's certainly enjoyable to the senses. And if this is the only time they have to truly be together then they should enjoy it.

"Justin…Sunshine…I don't know what's going to happen now, and I can't promise that this will be easy, but I can promise you that I love you, as well. An all consuming love that I didn't think humans capable of. If you left I would have to come with you, not just to keep you safe, but I'm afraid that I'll never want to be without you again. I will always be loyal to Arthur, but for you, I would give up my Knighthood. I want to always see you and touch you and feel you and hear you. I did not believe in soul mates and destiny, but I do now, seeing you has made me believe that anything is possible. I believe it would crush Arthur to know about us, and while I am always honest, to a fault, I don't ever want to lose you. I can't lose you.

"it may be wrong and selfish, and if I can forgive you and you can forgive me, but I want to be with you, as often as possible. We need never tell Arthur or anyone else. We are both in the castle often enough and even though somehow we have never met, it's not unreasonable that we shouldn't meet. And I happen to know of a secret passage outside the castle into the meadow just beyond the palace walls, but very hidden from views, as it's covered in every tree imaginable, while still letting in some sun light. It would be my pleasure to show you and share that with you. I never thought I would ever find something or someone that would make me question my loyalties to Arthur, but you, Sunshine, my heart, my lover, my life, my world, are worth everything."

Justin has to get his breathing under control for a minute before responding the best way he knows how. He takes his hands, grasps Brian's face and crushes their lips together. Both moan loudly at the contact. Both hard instantly and grinding against each other with an urgency they've never felt before. Brian's arms wrap tightly around Justin and Justin does the same. Hands exploring each other's backs, heads and as Brian's hand goes down to grab and rub Justin's bottom both men groan even louder than before.

"Brian…oh…my..."

Brian knew Justin had the most perfect bottom ever, but to feel it, to know those perfect round orbs are his and always will be. Such a magnificent feeling Brian has never known.

"Sunshine…I need…to be inside you…"

"Yes, Brian…my word, yes, please…"

Brian uses the oil next to his bed, which only previously he had used himself, late at night, but knew it was there for a reason, never did he think he would ever get a chance to use it nor did he feel the need to use it, until now. He lays Justin flush along the bed…such a sight to behold…his own angel staring wantonly through heavy lidded deep sapphire blue eyes. Brian crawls between his legs and places them around his hips and then he slowly prepares Justin using one, two, then three fingers. Justin is writhing and moaning and calling out Brian's name, Brian thinks he'll lose it before he's inside. He pulls out his fingers slowly and as Justin looks Brian right in the eyes, he slowly pushes into the amazingly, tightest, most perfect, hottest bottom Brian has ever pushed into. Both have to close their eyes for a moment at the delicious intrusion, at the pleasure pain that always happens when two men join in such a beautifully intimate way.

They're eyes don't stay closed long as they have to see each other, and what they see there not only surprises them, but proves to each other that they will say and do absolutely anything to keep this, to keep each other. The love, devotion, adoration, need, longing, lust, and absolute complete surrender of the other's heart, mind, body and soul to the other. Nothing in this life or any other life could compare to what they have right here, right now with each other, what they will always have, what they will always fight for, what they will always know.

They meet each other thrust for thrust, lips locking, tongues battling, hands entwined. Neither has ever felt such a need, such a possession, such a passionate desire to be this close and demand to be closer to another person before. And as their hips and lips battle and dance, their climax approaching fast and hard and as they both orgasm at the exact same moment it is the most perfect unison, the most perfect pleasure that you could ever hope for. Brian and Justin hold each other as tight as can be while coming down from the hardest, almost painful, orgasm ever experienced, never wanting to let go, never wanting to stop, and forever grateful they gave each other a chance. As their breathing returns to normal and they relax their hold a little, Brian lifts up to look into Justin's eyes and sees the love and devotion reflected back.

"You are my life, my heart and my love Sunshine. I will always be beside you, and you will always be mine. I will do whatever it takes to keep you with me and me with you. Being a Knight is not easy, and there are unfortunate times that I'm not here for days or weeks, but I swear I will always come back to you. There is nothing, absolutely nothing that will keep me from getting back to you. I would go through the fires of hell itself to get to you."

"Brian…never did I think I would ever find anyone I would be this close to, or feel this passion or desire, this longing, this…safety and love and completeness. I love you more than life itself. It's almost unfathomable that I have met you that we have what we have and have gotten there so fast. I feel the exact same way as you feel about me. I will always want you and I will always love you and be in love with you. Never will I want to be apart from you. I understand the long journeys you will go on. I am used to Arthur being gone, and I have always felt so alone until he returned, but I still did not completely feel whole and safe. But I know that waiting for you, always wanting you, I will never be lonely again, and I will feel safe and whole the moment my Knight returns to me."

And so Brian's and Justin's love continued to grow, to bond them together, to consume each other the moment they came together. No matter how far away they were, no matter how long they were apart, the moment they were able to be together again reignited the flame that was their passion to nuclear proportions. Brian took Justin through the secret passage he had discovered during one of his previous midnight strolls, as often as possible. Justin enjoyed being outside among the grass and trees almost as much as he enjoyed being with Brian, but having Brian there made it even more wonderful.


	3. Chapter 3

Queen Guinevere found out about Brian and Justin one afternoon, by accident. Arthur was not feeling well, which was very unusual, and Arthur had sent her to tell his Knights that they would not be meeting that evening. Some of them were at home with their families, in which Guinevere sent messengers to, but those Knights who were in the castle, she took it upon herself to tell in person. She had found everyone except Sir Lancelot. Surprisingly he was not in his room. She was sure he was always in his room when he was in the castle, rarely did he spend time roaming the castle, even though he enjoyed visiting every now and then. After exhausting all possibilities, she had no choice but to check the secret passage. You see she had found it too. Lancelot was sitting in the glade of trees when she came to the end of the tunnel and path. Neither ever told Arthur about the passage because they both understood that as close as they were to the King and as trusted as they were as friends and advisers, sometimes you need to escape where no one can find you. So they both used it from time to time, but one day she discovered something that she certainly never expected to see.

She used the secret passage in hopes of finding Lancelot. This time, however, she heard something before she saw anyone. Lancelot was a very quiet individual, so hearing anything worried her. What concerned her even more was when she could make out the kind of sounds she was hearing. Any person who is known to the world of human pleasure knows what those sounds mean, but never, ever had Guinevere heard those sounds coming from this glen, much less from Lancelot. In fact she wasn't even sure Lancelot did those kind of things in his bedroom, not that he couldn't, but he just didn't.

As she came to the clearing under the trees that she usually found Lancelot in, what she saw shocked her, on several levels to be honest. First was that Lancelot was having sex, second was that he was having sex with another man, and third was that he was having it with Justin, King Arthur's Justin. She had long admired Lancelot's handsome features, and she knew Justin and thought he was beautiful. She stood in stunned silence for a few moments before realizing that not only had she not been heard, but she was intruding on a very private moment between two people who were obviously in love, more so than any couple she had ever known. They were also very beautiful together. Anyone seeing them together would never question their feelings for the other, anyone except maybe Arthur. She slowly, quietly, and quickly went back to the palace. She hoped the first place that Lancelot and Justin would go would be one of their bedrooms, so she would have to wait. Although where to wait she wasn't sure, both their rooms were very near the Kings and her chamber.

As she sat in a seating area in the corridor near their chambers she thought back on what she had heard. Trying desperately to forget the actual sounds of passion (because although a proper lady would never admit such a thing – it was rather pleasing and watching others share such a passionate, intimate embrace was wrong, she wouldn't technically mind seeing that again, although she'll never go looking for it), she concentrated on the comments she heard after their obvious hard breathtaking release. Both declaring their undying love for the other, Justin calling Lancelot Brian, she wondered about that. Both sharing the others thoughts that they wished they could always be together and never part. She understood lovers never wanting to part.

She secretly loved Arthur more than he knew. They shared a bed, in more ways than one. It was not only their duty to produce an heir, but they were both human and while it was disconcerting at times when her husband found his marital duties, just that, duties, he seemed to enjoy them as well. Although she was sure that he could rub against anything and seek a release, it's a bit harder for a woman to feel pleasure that simply. They never talked about it, but she hoped he had some enjoyment from it, she certainly did, although it could have happened more often. That's when she realized that it had been more often. At first she thought it actually was her, but now that she'd just seen Justin with Lancelot, perhaps Arthur is not getting what he wanted from, as often as he used to from Justin. Then she wondered how long had Justin been with Lancelot and she was pretty sure that Arthur didn't know.

Guinevere did confront the lovers after they came back, although she waited a couple hours, and they both looked completely flushed with color, but both…so much happier than she had ever seen them before. She couldn't break that up, but they all needed to discuss the particulars of such a situation.

She found out it had only been going on for a few months, that it was completely by accident, that they couldn't tell Arthur, but they couldn't be apart and not see each other. She found out that Arthur had not been spending as much time in Justin's bed as he was previously. Although no one was sure what the circumstances were around that. Justin spent many nights in Lancelot's bed, not on purpose, but because they wore themselves out with their activities that lasted longer than most people. Not that they were objecting, it was such a wondrous feeling to wake up in the arms of your lover.

Lancelot had noticed that Arthur seemed a bit more distant, but no one knew why. Brian and Justin were afraid that he knew something about their relationship, but they didn't believe so. Guinevere could see the love so clearly on both their faces and in their eyes, that she couldn't tell them to stop, that she would keep this secret to herself and never let on. She would also, although she didn't really want to, suggest that she and Arthur work a little harder to try and produce an heir or two. It's not like she was using him, he was her husband and they were King and Queen.

* * *

><p>We all know that King Arthur was a tragedy and most believed it ended badly. Birth, life and death are all part of the great circle of life, so even if King Arthur had lived passed the legends and stories about him, his reign would have ended eventually. But the circumstances and people surrounding the tragedy are also different than what most people believe. King Arthur did eventually find out about Lancelot's betrayal…but again, it was not Guinevere, but Lord Justin that Sir Lancelot fell in love with. Arthur could have almost forgiven Lancelot had Guinevere been the one. But Justin, his Justin, Arthur needed Justin, needed to protect Justin, needed to keep him safe. Justin needed Arthur's love, of this Arthur was sure. So to have his most trusted advisor and his lover share the same bed, and hide it from him was unforgivable.<p>

And so it came to pass that once Arthur knew of Lancelot's crime, so too did the rest of the Knights. Lancelot was to be held accountable to his crime against Arthur, for bedding Arthur's lover and making the Queen lie and keep the secret from him. What hurt him even more was Justin's betrayal. Arthur had always loved him, protected him, kept him safe and the times they had shared in all activities and conversations, Arthur thought they were the happiest times in his life. He should have known something was different when Justin was missing from his bed those nights, but he didn't think anything of it. The only difference he could pick up with anyone was that Justin seemed happier. Even Lancelot seemed happier, he never could make the connection, nor would he. He honestly didn't remember Lancelot being interested in men or women that way, any way, actually.

King Arthur's knights, they filled the Table Round,

Save for one who stood before them,

For once without a weapon;

For once he stood in shame.

The trial's charge was treason

And betrayal of an oath,

And should his guilt be proven

Death would fall on traitors both!

The knights would counsel Arthur's hard decision.

And Lancelot, his head held high, said,

"I'm tried for love of Justin...

My crime was love."

The first to speak was Kay with sharpest tongue,

"He is a man like any other

The word of kings command him;

His heart does not obey.

For all his strength and boldness,

This knight's spirit is too weak.

His crime knows no excuses,

And no favours may he seek!

The laws of kings don't bend and can't be broken."

And Lancelot, his head held high, said,

"I stand for love of Justin...

For pride in love."

"I know this knight right well," spoke bold Gawaine,

"And he has ever stood beside me.

With steel he's answered insults,

Defended chivalry.

And oft this man contended

For the honour of your wife and kingdom.

His actions were not proper,

But should not cost him his life!

His service past should earn of you some mercy."

And Lancelot, his head held high, said,

"I fought for love of Justin...

I'll fight for love."

Sir Tristan spoke, "I love my uncle's wife.

For her I gladly suffer;

She is my heart's delight:

Iseult, the one who tempts me

And she for whom I'm pure...

My love for her confounds me,

And is all of which I'm sure.

I understand my brother's contradictions..."

And Lancelot, his head held high, said,

"I cry my love for Justin...

I've cried for love."

Spoke Galahad, the purest of them all,

"Have no fear of predilection,

For though he is my father,

He is my source of shame.

He joined in sinful union

With my unbeguiling mother,

And for all his claim at virtue

He has gone and bed another!

The laws of God declare this act damnation."

And Lancelot, his head held high, said,

"I lie in love with Justin...

I've lied for love."

As Arthur wept, he called the wrath of Heaven

On the lovers who'd betrayed him:

On the knight he had called "brother,"

Thought worthy of his trust;

On the queen who'd hid deception,

Yet could say she loved him still;

For lost innocence and beauty,

And in justice for their guilt,

King Arthur knew the only price for treason...

And Lancelot, his head held high, said,

"I'll die in love with Justin...

I'd die for love."

If Sir Lancelot had truly been with the Queen, that would have been a treason punishable by death. However, since Lancelot had fallen in love with and slept with Arthur's lover, no treason was truly committed. King Arthur was still very angry and hurt that his true lover and his best, truest Knight had an affair; he banished Lancelot from the Kingdom. Guinevere was not sentenced to death, but she and Arthur did drift apart after that. For while no crime was committed, she also did not tell the truth of Lancelot's or Justin's crime.

Arthur desperately wanted Justin back in his graces, for while furious at such a betrayal, he still loved Justin and could not wait until Justin stopped grieving his loss and sought Arthur's comfort. This did not work out the way that Arthur had hoped though, for throughout the rest of his life, which is unfortunately short, due to the quest for the Holy Grail and battles and civil unrests and wars over lands and power, he had lost something very important. For while Lord Justin was still in the castle, gone were his days of glorious paintings, ended were his beautiful tapestries, no more drawings or baking could be seen of Justin's. He no longer smiled or laughed, even Lady Debbie and Michael missed him in the kitchens. He would do whatever was requested of him, but whoever was making the requests had to go to his room to tell him what to do. And when Arthur came to him when he had a free moment, he found that it was like controlling a rag doll. His Justin had no more life in him. Soon Arthur stopped spending time with Justin and more and more time with his Knights on whatever quests and wars he deemed necessary.

Most people assumed, although it was never spoken out loud, that the reason King Arthur's reign fell quickly was due to his increasing anger and loneliness. For you see, although he had not lost Queen Guinevere, but because she knew of Justin's and Brian's affair the King had refused to continue to confide and trust in her. Others saw this weakness and this change in power and took full advantage of it. Not even King Arthur understood how deeply he cared for Queen Guinevere until she no longer gave in to his will. She had taken up sleeping in Justin's room, while Justin had started sleeping in Brian's room. King Arthur had wanted to get rid of and burn all of Lancelot's belongings, but he could not see Justin in pain. And when guards started to remove things from Lancelot's room, Justin was in so much pain that Arthur took some mercy on him and said the bed, it's coverings, and the tapestry Justin made could stay. It did pain terribly to see Justin live in Brian's room, or rather exist, because he wasn't living at all.

Meanwhile Brian was miserable, as well. He had left the country, for no one wanted to be associated with a former Knight of King Arthur who had betrayed the King so thoroughly. He changed his appearance, took all the money he could and lived on his own farm far outside the realm of the kingdom. It was a simple existence, but one void of any love, happiness or joy. The months he had spent with Justin were truly the best he had ever known in all his life. His deepest, most fervent wish, hope and prayer were that one day he would be reunited with Justin, even though he didn't see how that was possible. He went back to Britain twice a year, to hear any rumors or stories about King Arthur's reign, and of course if there were any whispers at all about a blond boy around the palace. Arthur wasn't happy, Guinevere wasn't happy and there was no mention of Justin at all, in any context. So Brian would return to his farm in the Scottish lands, and was somewhat content until the next time he would return near Camelot.

* * *

><p>After the eventual, but untimely death of King Arthur, Guinevere did join a convent, for she truly did love King Arthur, but after Lancelot was banished, and Justin was barely alive, Arthur was a different person and she realized when he died that the only thing she could do was join a convent and spend her days serving the Lord with other like minded women…where there was no kings or queens, duties or responsibilities, or enemies or wars. The last thing she did before she left was say good-bye to Justin, who wept for her leaving him. But Guinevere did something for Justin, even though she did not tell Justin. She was aware of Lancelot's returns, and on his last visit she had him followed. Before her final journey to the convent she gave Michael instructions to go see Lancelot and give him word that if he still loves Justin, to come get him, and she would instruct the few Knights remaining in Camelot that they are not to interrupt or harm either of them.<p>

To say that Brian was happy and surprised by Michael's appearance would be an understatement. To further learn of Arthur's death and Guinevere's permanent move to a convent furthered his astonishment and misery. But Michael saved his best news for last. They took some time to grieve for their friend, master and king, but Michael had to tell Brian what he was meant to tell him.

"Sir L…"

"No… Sorry Michael, was it? It's Brian, only Brian, ever since I came here, I've been Brian, again. If only…ah well, sorry, was there something else you wished to tell me, son?"

"Yes, Sir, ummm… Brian, Guinevere did send me for more than King Arthur's death. I don't know how banishment works, but since he's *sniffle* no longer king."

"I'm happy here Michael, well, as happy as I can be, by myself. I appreciate you coming all this way to tell me in person, it would have been good to see Guinevere again, we were great friends, along with…never mind. I like it here, and I don't think I'll ever go back."

"Forgive me for being so bold, but is there nothing, not one thing, or person, that you would go back for?"

"What are you asking Michael? Do you have someone particular in mind?"

He's a cute kid, but nothing compared to who he gave up. And having not heard anything about him the last few years, he has nothing to go on, best to move on and hope the hurt lessens.

"Begging your pardon sir, but I don't mean me… not that I wouldn't be interested, but I know someone who would be very hurt should I try anything. Someone who would very much like to know you're doing well and I'm certain you would want to know the same."

If he didn't know better… but it's best not to hope that much.

"Get to the point Michael, I haven't got time for riddles or guessing games."

"Fine then… Justin."

…..

"What did you say?"

"Justin… would want to know you're well, and you should know that he's, well, physically he is well enough, but he never comes out of his room, or should I say your room, he barely eats, he never…"

"MICHAEL! Are you telling me you know where Justin is, and he's not well, and you want me to go, what, get him, make him better? How is that supposed to work, he's used to palace life, not farm life."

"Brian…at the moment I don't think he'd care, if he got to see you. He moved into your old room over a year ago, never leaves, sleeps all the time, he doesn't paint, bake, sew, or even talk. My mom has to force feed him so he stays healthy. Queen, well, I guess just Guinevere now, she used to talk to him, but with her going into a convent she won't be there to take care of him. Oh, and the few Knights left who were loyal to Guinevere, who are still in Camelot are staying there until you hopefully arrive. Guinevere gave them all specific instructions that they are to wait till you return before leaving, if they so choose. Justin has nowhere to go. If the Knights leave, all the servants will probably leave. I don't know what exactly will happen, but he really only listens to Guinevere, and barely at that. When she found out you had been coming back she had someone follow you last time so that's how I found you this time. She didn't tell Justin anything for we didn't want to get his hopes up, but when he's not staring at nothing, or asleep, he's crying. I know he really loves you and he misses you terribly and I bet it would mean more to him than anything else in the world to see you and know you still do love him."

By this point Brian is sitting, as his legs have turned to mush. Justin has given up on living, not happy, not painting, oh to be in a world with no sunshine. Only a few knights remain…what choice does he have? He had to see Justin… oh, god, to see Justin again. Did he dare hope that he could bring him back here, with him? He truly had no choice, if Justin is sick and lonely and lost, then he could only do one thing… go get him. Brian honestly never thought he would get the chance at a life with Justin, and this soon. He felt for Arthur, verily he did, but he never really gave us a chance to explain ourselves either.

"So Michael… you coming back with me? Or are you leaving now and I'll meet you in Camelot when I'm finished packing?"

"Oh, that was fast, umm… if you don't mind, I'll go with you, it took me a couple of days, on horse, and I would need to restock before leaving, and I certainly wouldn't mind traveling with someone."

"Well, that settles it. I have a carriage we can ride, that will not only carry more supplies for more people, but hopefully I won't be coming back alone, either. I'll gather all that I need, why don't you go to the local village and get what you need to get, and meet back here as soon as you can. My horses and I don't need rest, so why don't you take one of my horses, then your horse can rest before going back."

After all preparations were made Michael and Brian were on their way. The trip took two days, but they had more than enough for several people for several days. Brian wanted to make sure he had more than enough not knowing what they would need. Michael was pleasant to be around, he was glad Justin had him among his friends when Arthur kept him, well, not a prisoner, but seemingly close enough. At times they traveled in silence, Michael wondering how Justin was doing and what his mom and he were going to do. Brian thinking solely about Justin and what was going on and what would happen next.

When they finally arrived in Camelot Brian was surprised at the changes, it was a little bit worse for wear, but a lot less people. A lot less happy people, and apparently no one recognized him. He knew his appearance had changed, but didn't know it had changed that much. Of course he no longer wore armor or chain mail, or any type of uniform. He must look like a commoner, he knew his hair was longer, and he had a beard and mustache, short, but there.


	4. Chapter 4

He knew exactly what room to go to, but first he stopped by the kitchen to get some food, easy to eat food, whatever soup Debbie might have and some calm tea, just the way Justin liked it, and maybe a piece of bread with some preserves that Justin used to like. Debbie was thrilled to see him and much to his surprise knew he'd be back for Justin one day. She had seen them together and saw the change in Justin. How is it that the palace's baker saw it and their king didn't?

Brian walked into his room with the tray and was at first pleased that Justin was asleep, then he could put the tray on the table next to the bed and surprise him, but then he wasn't pleased. Justin looked sick, really sick. He was thin anyways, but his skin was even paler than before, not a healthy pale at all. The curtains were still closed, such a shame, he could have used the sun. And from what Brian could notice under the bedcovers, he looked thinner than usual. Well, certain activities were out of the question for a while, but if Brian could convince Justin to come back, then he would wait as long as necessary for Justin to be healthy again.

Brian smooth's Justin's hair back. It's not as smooth as he remembered, but then again, the boy, man, probably needs a bath. He resists the urge to kiss him, not wanting to start anything that Justin shouldn't finish.

"Justin."

"Brian." Oh, how Brian had missed that voice, even if it does sound strained.

"Justin, wake up, I want to see those beautiful blue eyes I've missed so much."

"Brian…I…missed…too…" He can tell Justin is still asleep, and even though he looks like he's about to cry, he hasn't seen anything so beautiful since, well, since he was banished. Maybe he will have to take matters (meaning Justin) into his own hands.

"Justin *kiss* I want you *kiss* to wake up *kiss* and look at *kiss* me, please."

Justin's eyes are fluttering, trying to open, feeling something on his face, and he knows that voice, this is by far his most realistic dream yet, usually it's a distant sound, and this sounds much closer and can feel it too. Oh great, that probably means he's crazy if it sounds and feels more real.

He opens his eyes and is momentarily stunned to see Brian, his Brian, it can't be, he's gone, has been gone for years, he reaches out a hand, assuming it will go right through the most beautiful wonderful apparition he's ever had.

And he gasps and stares wide eyed when his hand meets real warm skin.

"Good day, Sunshine."

"B…Brian…that's really you."

"Yes it is me, I was told some disturbing news and I had to come see you."

At first Justin smiles, then the smile fades and turns to panic and fear.

"No Brian, you can't be here, you were banished, what are you…"

"Justin, you need to calm down and listen to me… are you listening?"

Justin nods, still worried, but always trusting in Brian… always. Deep breath, here goes.

"Justin…King Arthur… he isn't king anymore…wait… let me finish…Arthur…died…I found out 2 days ago when Michael came to tell me, along with the fact that Guinevere is going into a convent and I don't know what's going to happen to Camelot, but I own a small farm house in Scotland, that's all mine and has room for one more, along with my horses and other animals. You need to get better, you look sick and so thin, and I can't think of anything better happening right now than you leaving here, leaving Britain and coming to live with me, for however long you want me."

"I…Brian…I remember Guinevere…saying something about a convent…I don't remember about Arthur. I'd say I wish I did, but he hurt me when he banished you, I hurt so much…good Lord in Heaven, Brian, you're here, I hurt, I really hurt, I don't want to hurt any more, I don't care where we go just take me with you, I can't be without you anymore."

And with that Justin launches himself into Brian's arms, not quickly as he is weak, but fast enough to throw Brian off balance and Brian gets toppled down to the rug with Justin on top of him. They both feel so good in each other's arms that they both sigh. Brian can feel that Justin isn't as skinny as he thought, but it's enough… he needs food, lots of rest, fluids and some sun, and of course, Brian's thinking, lots of love, in every kind he can possibly give Justin.

"Justin, my sweet wonderful Justin. I've missed you so much. More than I thought possible. I love you, I love you so much, I've never stopped and I never will. I am so sorry I didn't come back, but I couldn't. As soon as I found out the my banishment was over because of Arthur's passing I came straight away."

"Brian, I know you couldn't come back, I was so lonely. I didn't know if I'd ever be whole again and I knew I couldn't leave to find you. I love you, so much, it feels so good to be in your arms, never let go, don't ever let go. Please don't let me go."

"I promise Sunshine… forever."

"Forever, Brian… my Brian…my real Knight in, well not shining armor, but you do look amazing with your long hair and beard. One would hardly recognize you, but I will always know you no matter where we are or who is there or what we are doing."

"Your Knight, your Brian…and my Sunshine…once we get some food in you and expose you to more sun light. I'm glad you like my new look, I needed it so I could come back without be recognized."

Brian helps Justin up and helps him back in bed before going to pack all the things from Justin's room they'll want. Brian has Justin pick which works of art to take with them. Oddly enough he only takes a few, one of which being the tapestry of his village from Brian's old room, that brought them together the first time. Brian loads up his carriage with his horses, after they've rested a few hours. Debbie has given them more bread and baked goods and preserves and cured meat than they could use for the next year. Justin feels good to finally be going with Brian. He knew they would never have another reason to be apart. Brian hired one of the ranch hands from Camelot to drive them back, at least for a couple hours (with the driver's horse tied in back) so Brian could have a little private time with just Justin before going home, and what a superb thought that was.

They had both forgotten how good it felt to hold each other, but no more, not once more would they ever allow anyone to come between them. Justin is cradled in Brian's lap, feeling safe and secure for the first time in years. With his arms around Brian's neck and Brian's arms around his waist.

"Now before you fall asleep or I get too busy telling you about my house, our home, there's one thing that I've been wanting to do for a while, and now I finally can."

Justin picks up his head and looks in Brian's eyes, face so close, he can tell before Brian even closes his eyes, but as their lips meet, it's that same shock they got the first time. That sense of absolute right that nothing could ever feel this good, but they do, always have and always will. Justin moans softly into Brian's mouth, both remembering not only the feelings between them, but the realization that neither have done anything even close to this since the last time they saw each other. Justin is moving his hips slightly, desperately trying to find something to rub on, the pressure and anxiety to ejaculate, when he hasn't wanted to for years, he feels ready to explode any second. Brian's not doing much better with Justin moving his hips, which is rubbing his erection repeatedly.

"Brian…touch me…please."

"You as well…Sunshine…been too long…"

"Far…too long."

In no time at all their pants are down, Justin is facing forward in Brian's lap grinding down hard on Brian's erection while Brian wraps his hand around Justin's sex. Panting, grinding, moaning, groaning, they scream out each other's names as an orgasm as powerful as their first time come rushing out of them, over and over, until they collapse back in the seat.

"It feels so good to hold you Sunshine. I love you so much, more than you'll ever know, the past few years have been hard as hell, and I didn't know if we'd be together again."

"This is the first time I've felt safe and happy and pleased in years. I am looking forward to our life together. And I love you more than you'll ever know, too, so maybe we both love each other equally."

"Maybe Sunshine, maybe… but I'm still never letting you go."

And that smile, that sunshine smile that Brian had missed so much, was back, just like that. Brian vowed right then and there to spend the rest of his natural life making that smile appear on Justin's face.


End file.
